The Return: A Cancer Free, Porn Free, & (Now) Chicago Based Blog

Hello, Old Friend! I have missed you desperately in my time away from the blogosphere. I know I have written posts many a time with explanations on radio silence for time frames brief and long but, this one is my most emotional return to date so, please bear with me as I hash out where I have been these past 6 months and reminisce a little bit about how happy I am to be back. 

My 2013 has been a whirl wind of adventures, good and bad, to say the very least. What I have always loved about having a blog is the constancy... no matter how long I stray away from my comfortable little niche within the web, it is always here waiting for my return. With a few swift clicks, I am back in the familiar layout of blogger with my line up of posts patiently waiting to have attention paid to them once more. Ha, an embarrassing blend of post drafts and final products making up my personal tangled rainbow of food, fun, and scribbled disasters ;)

When my story left off here in my blog/sanctuary, we were at a high note in my life. A very sweet, very romantic high note. I got engaged, something that still makes me smile every time I type the words. Engaged! Engaged! Engaged! Totally beaming right now. Not beaming because being engaged is fun, because so far, it is only so fun before it because a trial in organization, appointments, and impatience to be married already! Beaming because I love my fiance, Esquire, so friggin' much. 

We got engaged on January 10th. On January 15th, I made an (if I do say so myself) amazing engagement cake and went to my lazer tagging-pizza-engagement party to celebrate with our friends in DC. I was drafting that post (engagement cake/fiesta) and trying to finish up all my posts on the hellish cupcake alphabet (seriously, what was I thinking there, guys?) when January 17th came around. 

On January 17th, everything shifted in a huge way for me. My mother was diagnosed with breast cancer. She hadn't told my siblings and I that she had been going through all of the testing through the holidays. She didn't want us to worry, especially me as I talked about wedding planning/hopes for my pending engagement, but the tests had been confirmed and it was now time to let us know. Cancer.

Cue the whirlwind. Luckily for my pending marriage, Esquire and I had already been discussing relocating to the Chicago-land area based on a new job I had been offered... because as soon as I heard this news- I was clawing to get back to Chicago/my Mom as soon as possible. I took the new job in the Chicagoland area, flew back and worked a few weeks here, a few weeks there, stayed for two surgeries and the majority of treatments... and by April, Mom was cancer free! 

Those became my new favorite words to type. CANCER FREE! CANCER FREE! CANCER FREE!

Beaming again. This time because I love my Mom. 

Throughout my time at home and while away, wedding planning became my Mom's favorite distraction. So, we got a LOT done those first few months. Booked the venue, food, band, flowers, bridesmaids' dresses, and even found my dress. Which is a story for another post but, truly was a "186 dresses later" experience. When April rolled around, we just had details to deal with which was great because I was back in DC for the next significant window of time. Working remotely, figuring out moving to Chicago for after Esquire graduated, helping him network and mail out hundreds of job inquiries, and this is when I tried to post the first time and found that my blog was being re-worked to a PORN SITE. Yep. Whenever you would click on my page or a new post, you would be re-directed to some verrrrry saucy sights! I am glad my new employers didn't check my browsing history for that window of time because, oh, the things my page was taking people too... 

Very very different cupcakes, let me tell ya. 

So, I didn't post anything! Any new post I put up was going to take you, my lovely readers, to something far less PC than my page and so I sent a memo to blogger and then another and then another and continually checked the web for answers as to why/how... and just waited for the solution to come. April came and went...

In May, Esquire graduated from Law School! Studying for the bar began and the house hunting was driven into high gear as we could now move without any obligations lingering to DC. Deciding to take ANOTHER huge life and time commitment, we were directed to a great little house in my old hometown and decided to BUY! Past me, May me, was so naive thinking this would be an easy move for us, ha. Which brings us to June and July....

June was essentially weeks of goodbyes and packing up our lives into a massive truck. DC is a city I don't think I could ever say enough great things about. While I am very very happy with our move and our decision, there is truly not a better place on the planet I could have spent my early 20s. And my friends... man. They are truly a family to me that Esquire and I both were devastated to leave. Which was essentially why June was just... sad. Esquire was spending every minute of his day studying and when he took breaks, I was making him move the heavy things we owned. I was spending every minute of my day working and then packing as much as possible. And our nights were devoted to saying goodbye to the people and city we love so much. We drove out on June 28th and got into Chicago just in time for July 4th. 

July was the introduction to our new lives in Chicago and as homeowners. This is when our house gained the adorable new nick name of "The Money Pit". When we moved in, the house began to reveal its secrets in all kinds of new, exciting, and expensive ways. The kitchen project that was supposed to be completed was close... but not close enough. No appliances, counter tops, finished walls, cabinets... our kitchen was an empty room with loud men and machines working everyday for the first 3 weeks of our lives there. When we moved in we also realized we had no electricity anywhere but two rooms on the first floor (that was fixed by week 2), had no hot water (fixed midway through week 1), and no AC (fixed midway through week 2). We also had no internet or cable access, despite the Comcast hookup, so we had to have a technician come and repair the cables that were worn out in the basement (fixed during week 2- just in time for Esquire to be able to study for at least a few weeks for the bar in his own home). Even when things would be working, we would gain and then lose with our new place. Hot water! But our sewage was backed up so we couldn't use any sinks, toilets, showers, washing machines, until that was unclogged the next day... Electricity! But all of our outlet covers were removed so you couldn't actually plug anything in until we replaced them...

Ha, you get the idea. We love our new place despite the tantrums (which, still continue! just last night I found out the dryer didn't work...when I moved a massive pile of wet clothes into the tumbler). I think we are actually even better for it as now we truly appreciate things like counter tops. Never before have I realized how amazing having counter tops is. But when I lived for two weeks with appliances/cabinets but no surface to cook on... I am now blisteringly aware of how very cool counters are. And sinks. Man, sinks ROCK! Working water that gets hot and you can put dishes in is insanely sexy. Don't even get me started on fridges that are in the kitchen instead of randomly placed in a dining room. Just all, so good...

In the midst of house explosions and unpacking, we still weren't exactly taking it slow this past month. I had two showers, one bachelorette party, and a hoard of different overnight guests make the rounds, as well as two trips to Wisconsin for family. Plus, you know. Work. And throughout all of the chaos, Esquire was trying to find quiet corners to study for the bar in. Which was less than 24 hours ago! So proud the man survived... we find out if he passed in October! But that is a BIG relief off our plates for the moment. 

And now it's August! And I have returned, ha. I got the clean bill of "Porn Free Blogging" from Blogger last week. Turns out, one of my widgets was the culprit! Once I removed the excess gadget, BAM! My blog was completely mine again, back out of the gutter (for the most part) and stalled on Letter I. I can't promise a routine right now as, my life still isn't routine. So far August plans include another shower this weekend, engagement pics, a trip to Michigan, Esquire taking a bachelor trip to Vegas, dance lessons for the wedding, cake tastings, pre-marital sessions with our officiant, and oh yeah, trying to get into shape. Our wedding is in SEPTEMBER, guys and I still am a curvy cupcake eater who needs to rock a white gown! 

Ha, but I do plan to post when I can. Despite the crazy. I feel like the crazy may just BE my life right now and I refuse to keep pining for my blog when it is no longer glitching to porn and I can blow off some stress by sharing here again! Plus, there is a lot of updating that needs to happen here! Need to finish the doomed cupcake alphabet posts in rapid succession (I finished cupcake Z almost a YEAR AGO, guys! That is how long this has been hanging over my head!) and post my engagement cake for one thing! Then we are into the fresh start posts! Like the first meal I made in my new kitchen! Spicy roasted pork loin with mango salsa, cheesy polenta, and watermelon. Yum, have pics and recipes and joyful exclamations about things like stoves, sinks, and counter tops! 

In the meantime, thank you for always being somewhere I can come to and share. Thank you for asking me "where have you gone?" and "we miss you" posts that I didn't answer due to collapsing under stress and fatigue. I read them and appreciated them, even while feeling guilty that I wasn't posting due to time and strange porn-site technical issues. I missed you guys too. I hope this explains where I was. I have never posted a picture of myself on my blog before... mostly because I thought I should keep myself anonymous but also because I am a pretty self conscious person. However, this is a new me writing. After all this year has put me through and blessed me with, I feel completely transformed. And I want to start being more open with who I am to you guys, the chaotic with the calm, and let go of the anonymity. 

So, here is me. Dancing with Esquire at a carnival. This was taken in April, when I came back to my fiance' and my mom was cancer free! We were still in DC and this pic shows exactly how excited we were in that specific moment in time for all things coming and still to come! I am sure more pictures and overshares are in store for you all, ha. Looking forward to the next adventures, this time with all of you in my life! 

Love you all so much! Thank you for the never ending support :)