I was "That Kid" in school...

You know... that kid....

The guy or gal who just needs to shut up when the teacher asks a question. Any question. They always have an opinion and they always want to share it. Doesn't matter that no one, possibly not even the teacher, wants to hear it. They are so excited about learning and knowing and being... they must say whatever they have to say.

I am one of them.

I know...

I knooooooooooooow!

Now, you may be wondering how I can recognize "that kid" when I am amongst their ranks. Because, when not in an English classroom, I was NOT that kid. In high school, I was never that kid. In high school, avoiding being that kid was easy because I was constantly insecure about everything I said- convinced it was stupid, wrong, would sound funny, or all of the above.

Ah, high school. Good times.

For a large portion of my undergrad, in fact, I was completely silent. Borderline mute. I was usually thinking about whatever I was reading, doodling in my margins about story-lines, or staring at the chalk boards in horror as they tried to teach me concepts I'd never understand. Simply beyond my realm of comprehension. Such as math. Or science.

But then, midway through my undergrad...things changed. I finished my gen eds and was suddenly in the world of my major: writing! Reading! And then my minor, interactive media! Designing! Illustrating! Creating! About writing! And reading!

Cue monstrous transformation. 

Frankly, becoming that kid... was inevitable. Once the high school insecurities fell away, my passion for reading coupled with my lack of a filter lent itself to my never. shutting. up. 

Ever.

And when teachers stopped calling on me... it didn't stop my determination to speak. I would just flutter around in a panic, hoping to be called on, begging to speak my mind, whatever it was on- despite the rolled eyes of my fellow classmates staring at me in exhausted horror.

Honestly, even at the time, I didn't know what to do. I couldn't stop it. The compulsion was too strong. Like word vomit. I would always go into my English class thinking quiet thoughts. But, they would burst forth as soon as my teacher asked a question I thought I knew the answer to.

Having been a normal student in all of my other classes- I knew how loathed "that kid" was. I myself had loathed "that kid". They came off all superior, all excited and awake. When all you want to do is sleep, "that kid" is bouncing off the walls with answers to questions you'd rather not be thinking about.

Everyone wants to kill that kid when they are in class with them. Everyone. There is a breaking point, of course. It's not an immediate murder plot. But eventually, everyone gets fed up with "that kid". And then everyone spends class imagining how to kill them.

There aren't a lot of ways to kill a student in a class room. At least, without getting caught. 

All things pointy, while probably the most tempting to day dream about, would never work to rid the world of "those kids". I am pretty sure the fact that my teacher had us in lecture seating is the only thing that saved me from death by pencil in my English 311 class, but really, all things pointy wouldn't work out in the assailants favor. 

Thankfully, most of the other ways to kill another person are JUST as conspicuous as sharp methods. Therefore, neither of the following were attempted by my classmates. Although, I am certain they were considered.

Wow. That last image is really violent.

I apologize. 

To you and to Darth Maul. 

In conclusion, next time you are fantasizing about killing "that kid" in the class you find boring or exhausting, try and remember that, while they may be a geek, it doesn't mean you should mentally kill them. 

First of all, because most of the methods are too obvious and flawed plans are no fun to fantasize about. No one wants to think about failure. Secondly, because "that kid" may be nice. Like I try to be. And maybe in other classes, they are just like you, quiet and annoyed with that other kid who won't shut up.

So, to all you normal people out there who just want to learn in a balanced learning environment, try and be forgiving for "those kids". Patience is a virtue.

And to my fellow out-spoken geeks, watch out for subtle murder plots. If you have people in your class who are more creative than pointy things, fire, and light sabers... you could be in trouble.

I'm not saying be afraid of your class mates...

Just cautious. 

The Cake is NOT a Lie... Soda Cake

So, for those who are unfamiliar with the video game "Portal", I don't suppose this post's name makes a whole lot of sense...

I suppose one could simply summarize the game for the newbies who come across this page but, the important part of the story is really just that this recipe is a complete facade. You should go play portal and work it out for yourself. This here though, is DISGUSTINGLY simple. It is cannot count as a recipe, it is a completely ridiculous, just 3 ingredient, recipe. For a cake. 3 ingredients, including the can of icing, FOR A CAKE. And YET! It really is just three ingredients. Including the can of icing!

This is "No Lie" Cake. It's fluffy, light, and made with just one can/12 oz bottle of soda and a cake mix. That's all.

Being a stage 10 klutz, I still made my kitchen/self a disaster. As you can clearly see, right here:

Oh, and here:

But in the end, the cake turned out nicely.

This cake, shown here, is a vanilla cake mix made with a black cherry soda. You simply combine the cake with the pop and mix it. I never used a hand mixer, just a big spoon, but I imagine that would make it even more ridiculously fluffy. I topped mine with a can of icing (vanilla) and ATTACKED everything with sprinkles.

I piped "no lie" in melted chocolate that I let cool in the fridge until it'd create that nice 3D look and, ta-da! "No lie" Soda Cake.

Anyway, please make note that this cake is simple and you should keep it simple when working with it. Twice now I have overshot the ability of this treat to hold its shape once free of the pan. I will never do so again. That is the main reason I got into an epic battle with those sprinkles. The cake was near cracking, in a desperate attempt to glue it together with frosting, I covered it with sprinkles to keep things in place. Just save yourself the nightmare, keep it in a pan or in a single layer. You'll be happier, promise.

Make and enjoy :)

Soda Cake

-1 box cake mix

-1 can/bottle (12 oz) soda

Choose any flavor of both cake mix and soda. Stir to combine.

DO NOT ADD EGGS, OIL, OR WATER. SERIOUSLY- JUST THE SODA.

Pour into greased pans, bake at 350 until a tooth pick comes out clean (approx 25 mins). Cool it entirely and top with icing, powdered sugar, or cinnamon to your liking. Yellow cake mix with coke and cinnamon is delicious. Dr. Pepper with chocolate cake is also intriguing. Try something fun and let me know how it goes!


*Update* Showcased on Sweet Saturdays

Talking with My Hands

I talk with my hands.

I, in fact, almost named this web blog "Talking with My Hands" because I liked how this could be a place for me to tell my thoughts and stories, adding illustrations where I would usually gesture crazily with my hands.

I don't know if you are like me and are a hand-talker, but it's a really annoying habit to have. When people know you do it, they will occasionally stop listening to your over-the-top story in order to observe your over-the-top hand gestures. And you still can't stop it.

It's like a killer instinct. A ninja instinct.

It causes endless amusement to those of my friends who have caught on. I will mime to the extreme whatever my words are trying to express. I feel like a shadow puppet master, making shapes and motions like Mary Martin in "Peter Pan". It's truly an art.

I get it from my mother.

One night in particular, I recall my family giving my mom a really hard time about her hands constantly moving when she spoke. I'm from a pretty big family- two brothers, a sister, and my parents- and we all like to tease the others and joke in good fun. If you can't laugh at yourself, you won't do well around my family. And if you can't laugh at yourself and possibly laugh at others, you should probably avoid my giant extended family.

We think we're funny...

Anyway, my mom was actually seeming to get annoyed with our teasing so, we all tried to take it easy and just listen to her story. However, she was making it exceptionally difficult...

It looked like she was doing some crazy version of the YMCA. While her story was obviously rather interesting, all we could do was laugh. Once we noticed just how often she talked with her hands, we couldn't NOT notice long enough to listen. Plus, we wanted to mess with her even more now, having ample ammunition.

My brothers found that if you held her hands "nicely" while she was trying to tell a story, she'd start to stutter and be unable to speak full sentences.

Mom: Yeah! So..um... we walked helicopter... house... OH MY GOSH- What are you two doing?!

Brothers: Nothing.

Mom: Stop it! I don't believe you!

Brothers: We just want to hold your hands in an experiment.

Mom: I...wha...that is unbelievably...you... insulting!

Once she realized the game, she tried valiantly to defy them and tell her story any way, hands imprisoned or not. By J.K. Rowling, she was going to tell her story or kill my brothers trying!

And yet, try as she might, she couldn't tell her story without being able to gesture elaborately. She got frustrated and annoyed with my brothers and I began to feel genuinely bad for our teasing. I made everyone stop laughing and tried to defend my poor mother... it was all in good fun but, now it was just mean spirited.

Shock filled me as my family erupted in laughter. My dad actually choked on his double-buttered garlic bread he was laughing so hard.

I was hit with the swift realization that I now was now going to be the subject of torment for the evening.

For those of you who think my mom would have defended me, especially since she clearly brainwashed me to talk like a crazy person, you'd be wrong. She was right there with the rest of them, laughing and teasing like a champ.

Typical.

Kosher Beef Brisket & Roasted Garlic Mashed Potatoes

Once again, I've made something of Pioneer Woman's and thought I should share. I also used one of my own recipes though! Garlic mashed potatoes. Fluffy and delicious ones! So, I promise this is still my blog. Mine, mine, you hear me! All mine! Bahahahahaha!

Moving on.

I made this brisket for one of my mother's friends who is so lovely and such a part of our lives, I consider her to be an Aunt. My Aunt Karen is Jewish and I wanted to make her a dinner she would appreciate. The brisket is Kosher, the potatoes when paired with the brisket shown here are not, but if you wanted to make the meal traditionally kosher, it's an easy fix.

The brisket was delicious. I got rave reviews for a recipe that I simply tossed together and threw into an oven for approximately the entire day. The potatoes were also a "smash" (ha, get it?!). The green beens are just steamed up on the side, no recipe needed.

Karen appreciated the food more then anyone else seemed to, giving me lots of overly kind compliments. When you make this for your friends and family, I hope you have as lovely a dinner as we all had together.

It was a pretty great night. Hope you guys are up to the challenge :)

PW's Kosher Brisket Recipe

Ingredients:

-1 whole Beef Brisket, Trimmed Of All Fat (5 To 8 Pounds)

-1 bottle (24 Ounce) Ketchup Or Chili Sauce (make Sure It's Kosher)

-1 package Onion Soup Mix (make Sure It's Kosher)

Place trimmed brisket into a large baking pan.

Mix ketchup with onion soup mix. Add 1 cup of water or more to make it slightly thin.

Pour sauce over the meat, cover pan with foil, and marinate 12 to 24 hours in the fridge.

Place covered pan into a 275-degree oven and walk away for 6 to 8 hours, depending on how large the brisket is. Check tenderness when brisket has been cooking several hours: stick in two forks and pull in opposite directions. Meat should come apart easily.

When meat is done, remove from oven and place on a cutting board. Slice against the grain; don’t be disturbed if meat totally falls apart! That means it’s good.

Either return the sliced meat to the sauce until serving, or place meat on a platter and spoon sauce over the top.

If you want to keep it kosher and NOT mess it up with my potatoes, choose some new sides. Such as a kosher-for-passover noodle kugel!

Garlic Mashed Potatoes:

Ingredients:

• -2 1/2 pounds potatoes, peeled, quartered
• -4 cloves garlic, minced
• -1 (8 ounce) tub PHILADELPHIA Cream Cheese Spread
• -1 tablespoon butter or margarine
• -1 teaspoon salt
• 
  
• Cook potatoes and garlic in boiling water in large covered saucepan 20 min. or until potatoes are tender; drain. Mash potatoes until smooth. Stir in remaining ingredients until well blended.

Generation GaGa

Lady GaGa is... our generation's Madonna. She is beyond a music icon, morphing into a trifecta icon of music, fashion, and media. Her wardrobe is, in particular, always splashing entertainment news.

I mean, look at that outfit. So weird and so... totally awesome! You may hate GaGa's look, music, and personality. I am not entirely sure how I feel about all of those things either. But, you must admit, she is pretty interesting. You can't seem to look away. And, one way or another, everyone seems to be ga-ga for GaGa. She even warranted an entire episode in Glee, with iconic costumes for the entire crew to boot. And while her wardrobe isn't for us normal human beings, it must be noted, she wears a LOT of cool things. Fashionista of the decade type things. 

Including this celestial getup shown above here. Very awesome. She almost looks like Storm, from X-Men. Check the eyes. Clearly Stormy. 

I don't know how she is walking here. Those shoes are BEASTS. Not only are they platforms, they have spike heels. Although, I guess it's a photograph so, she may not be walking. She could just be standing, very still, and turning for each photo.

Back to my point! In strict regards to her fashion, I find myself having some GaGa envy. For just a week, I would love to dress like her. It's quite honestly a dream of mine, although I could never pull of the imagined looks. It's still just fun to come up with strange and fun outfits that GaGa could rock and I wish I could.

For example! A dress entirely composed of flowers

I think Project Runway proved to all of us that flower dresses are pretty. Exponentially so. Outside of a runway though, televised or otherwise, I am relatively certain Lady G is the only one who could pull the look off.

Please note, I am not wearing shoes. If I am wearing a mother nature approved outfit, I am pretty sure that's the way she'd want it.

Less pretty and more...vintage industrial is what inspired my next GaGa look.

Chain mail. Not just for jousting! It could make a clearly adorable flapper dress, and paired with the right helmet, probably look historically accurate. Ish. Okay, not at all. And I drew mine with a purple feather so, that's a wash for accuracy. It is accurate that my arms are flailing about aimlessly in the image. I am pretty sure if I had a heavy metal helmet on my head, with slits that are supposed to provide vision but clearly wouldn't be awesome at it, my arms would be doing just that. Flailing in locational concern.

This look is tricky because it would entail training live butterflies. Like the flower look, it'd be super pretty... but also difficult to exist in. I didn't mention this with the flower dress but... how would you ever sit down? You'd crush your flowers. And with the butterflies... wow. 

It'd be a massacre if you ever laid down on a sofa or bent down to pick something up.

Speaking of! GaGa should probably come out with her own line of leotards. To wear most of her ridiculous outfits and NOT show something inappropriate, my little cartoon self would CLEARLY need one. Especially if a butterfly flew away. Or flower wilted...

A large part of the appeal for GaGa is the scandal of her looks, the over the top sex of them... I don't role that way though. I prefer...not playing with the "ho" line.

Beginning to question these looks. A lot. Especially the butterflies. I mean... besides probably killing something whenever you moved...and it being a possible scandal if THEY moved... have you ever seen a butterfly up close? They are still bugs. I mean, yes, they have pretty wings. But if you look at them...

That is still a bug. A creepy looking, fuzzy, lots of feelers and legs, bug. To have hundreds of those clinging to my body... FRIGGIN JUMPING SOCKS, OR!

CATERPILLARS.

If caterpillars, AKA baby butterflies, were crawling over me in an attempt to compose my outfit, I am certain that you would be able to hear my screams in California. And for context, I live in Washington, DC. 

THAT is an accurate illustration. Lots of screaming. And immobile shock.

That is the thing about GaGa that makes everyone unsure what to think. On the one hand, she's awesome. On the other... why would a person want to wear/do that. It's like for every outfit that kicks lint, she needs to wear one that might make a normal person throw up. Just to maintain a balance. 

...I am pretty sure this outfit doesn't need commentary. It's meat, string, and fishnets. Delicious?

Pass.

I am not sure this generation's fashion icon is one I am willing to follow. My favorite GaGa looks are all flash, glam, and retro. Very reminisce of a certain cartoon character from my childhood.

Ohhh, yeah. Anyone else watch Jem? Jem and the Holograms? 

Epic cartoon. Super cheesy and very often pink. She was a millionaire who led a secret life as a rock star. As Superman was to Clark Kent, Jem was Jerrica. All young girls in the 80's/early 90's wanted to be both.

Yep. That's my new look. 

I am pretty sure my boss won't mind.

Caitlin Anne's Pumpkin Roll

My little sister may be seven years younger then I am but, I swear, she is at least 7 times more talented at everything then I am.

Everything.

And the girl is adorable to boot! You got to love her.

Even more, you have to love her baking. Remember how I said she is more talented then I am? Well, you should, since I JUST said she is. Her baking is astoundingly good. People seem to like what I whip up but, she makes things that floor everyone who tries them. And she's still in high school. She's whipping up all these crazy complex desserts and is merely fifteen years old.

Amazing.

Anyway! This is a treat she served at Thanksgiving that blew my mind. Its delicious, layered, and pumpkin spiced.

Buy up canned pumpkin while you can! And make this ASAP. Enjoy all :)

Caitlin's Pumpkin Roll

-3 eggs
-1 cup sugar
-2/3 cup canned pumpkin
-1 tsp. lemon juice
Sift together:
-3/4 cup flour
-1 tsp. baking soda
-1 tsp ginger
-2 tsp cinnamon
-1/2 tsp nutmeg
-1 tsp salt
-1 cup finely chopped pecans
Filling:
-1 cup powdered sugar
-4 tbsp margarine or butter
-6oz. cream cheese
-1/2 tsp vanilla

1. preheat oven to 375 degrees
grease and flour wax paper on a 15-x 10-x 2 in jelly roll pan
2. beat eggs at high speed for 5 minutes. gradually at sugar stir in pumpkin and lemon juice.
3. fold in sifted ingredients into pumpkin mixer. spread batter in pan and sprinkle pecans on. bake for 15 min. let cake sit in pan for 10 minutes after you take out of oven. then turn out onto a clean tea towel sprinkled with powdered sugar. peel of wax paper and while cake is still warm, roll up in towel lengthwise.
4. beat filling ingredients until smooth. when cake is coll, unroll and spread with filling. reroll cover with plastic wrap. let chill for one hour.